Murder of Goths

Some Parents Wander By Mistake

Looking out for friends with MH issues

My mental health issues have been talked about a bit on here, so I’ll assume it’s known that I’m not always doing wonderfully.

I have previously used the Samaritans, and have always found them wonderful. When I’m able I do try to donate to them. Fantastic service, more people should support it!

That out of the way, I’m really not sure what I think of #SamaritansRadar.

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Being an angry woman – and why it scares me

Thanks to my gender I’ve known from a very young age that the expectations for me were radically different than the expectations for a child born to the opposite gender.

Thanks to my gender I was taught that it was preferable to be;

- caring (even towards those who would hurt us – sometimes especially towards them)

- gentle (no raised voices, no swearing, no anger)

- accommodating (we learn to compromise, to put other people’s needs ahead of our own)

- carers (the eternal mothers, even before puberty)

- pacifists (we are mediators, the calming ones)

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Recommendation: Beautiful book

When my son was approaching his first birthday I went searching for something special he could enjoy both as a child and as a keepsake for when he’s all grown up. As I still own a personalised book from when I was little I thought that would be perfect. So my search began.

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Gender critical in a binary world

I’m well aware that identifying as a gender critical feminist is going to have put some people off me already. Possibly some will have decided I’m transphobic and written off everything I have to say already. If you think that gender critical feminism and transphobia go hand in hand but have read this far, bear with me, I want to point a few things out about myself.

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Rapists aren’t cartoon villains

If you haven’t watched it yet I strongly advise you to watch the latest Feminist Frequency video on Women as Background Decoration.

One of the points she raises is that violence against female characters is used as a shortcut to establishing a character as evil, and in doing so portrays sexual violence as something done by only evil cartoon villains.

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Finding a place and sense of worth in feminism

When I was younger I was a bit of an awkward girl, I was never into the girlie girlie stuff, but at the same time I was no tomboy. I was painfully shy, and that was made worse by not feeling like I had enough in common with people, so I found it hard to relate and join in.

I know many people tried to fit me into the tomboy box, I hated the colour pink and would refuse dresses and skirts.

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Magical vaginas

I have to confess, I got far too much pleasure from writing that title.

In case you’ve missed it a quick recap. A female games developer (who has already been getting a lot of hate for daring to be a woman in the games industry and having the gall to point out the games industry has a problem with sexism) split up with her boyfriend. Said boyfriend then wrote a blog and went to 4chan to accuse her of cheating on him with 5 guys. One of these guys was a games journalist who had given her positive reviews. Now people are up in arms about her corrupting the games industry.

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I appear to be allergic to being female

Thought I’d write a quick post on a point I made in my last post, just because it’d be a bit of a derailment in that post, but I also look like I’ve gone mad without an explanation.

So yes, I appear to be allergic to being female.

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Binary is for computers: The rewrite

I wrote a blog post the other day on gender identity and it’s been bugging me ever since as I didn’t feel it was very well written. That’s the problem with writing blog posts at gone midnight after a day of screaming children. So as my husband has taken the kids to his mum’s today I thought I attempt a rewrite that makes a little more sense.

If I fail to make any more sense here though, please read this post and realise that I agree with every word of it.

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Binary is for computers

Edit: There is a rewrite of some of the points in this post here.

If you know me in real life, you’ll know that my style icons are people like Dita Von Teese, Marilyn Monroe, Betty Grable, et al. I love my red lipstick and my 50’s dresses. All my favourite clothes just scream “womanly”. It is a look I get a lot of enjoyment from, but it is also a complicated ideal for me.

I used to enjoy a much more androgynous look. My inspiration back then was a long list of men in makeup. Richey James, Nicky Wire, Johnny Slut, Brian Slade.. I may have fancied some of them, but mostly I wanted to be them.

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