The Diet Industry and triggers

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I have to admit, this is a post about a specific conversation. But it got me thinking, and it got me thinking about something that I find tough to think about. So I figured getting it out of my system might stop it circling around in my mind.

You may have read before that I have struggled with disordered eating. I still struggle with the thoughts and still have the same triggers.

I want to talk about some of those. Shouldn’t need saying, but trigger warnings galore here.

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#DropThePlus and our daughters

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Sorry to be repetitive, but I’ve been reading more on the #DropThePlus campaign and it got me thinking. Lovely as Ajay is, I’m sorry to say the more I think about it the less keen I am on it. Though I agree totally with their desire to make a better world for girls, and applaud them for their attempts, if not their methods.

I suspect this will be a long post.

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Being stalked – a follow up

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I wrote that post about Jamie Dornan yesterday in a rage, and with little time to do so. Then as the day wore on and I thought about it in a bit more depth I realised there were a lot of issues I didn’t cover.

One of the things that made me realise there was more to cover was the comments I got after posting it – or more specifically the comments I didn’t get.

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My gentle boy and my strong girl

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You are both so little still, both still under 3, and already I can see that society is valuing some of your traits over others.

This breaks my heart, because you are both so much more than stereotypes, you are incredible and complex and will only get more so as you get older. I hope that I can bring you up to not be ashamed of parts of you just because they don’t conform to gendered expectations. Nothing about you is wrong, society and it’s small boxes are wrong.

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#GirlsMatter I’m proud to be an ex girl guide

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A lifetime ago I was a Brownie and then a Girl Guide, and I loved it.

I’ve spoken before about never quite feeling like I fit in, but this was one of the areas of my life where I did. I wasn’t an outsider looking in, I was right in the thick of it. This wasn’t because I was a naturally sociable child, nor was I confident, or any other of those traits that normally propel you straight into a group. It was because it was a space in which all talents, all interests, and all personalities could be at home. A space where everyone was valued and nurtured.

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Being an angry woman – and why it scares me

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Thanks to my gender I’ve known from a very young age that the expectations for me were radically different than the expectations for a child born to the opposite gender.

Thanks to my gender I was taught that it was preferable to be;

– caring (even towards those who would hurt us – sometimes especially towards them)

– gentle (no raised voices, no swearing, no anger)

– accommodating (we learn to compromise, to put other people’s needs ahead of our own)

– carers (the eternal mothers, even before puberty)

– pacifists (we are mediators, the calming ones)

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Gender critical in a binary world

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I’m well aware that identifying as a gender critical feminist is going to have put some people off me already. Possibly some will have decided I’m transphobic and written off everything I have to say already. If you think that gender critical feminism and transphobia go hand in hand but have read this far, bear with me, I want to point a few things out about myself.

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Let Books Be Books – where’s the harm?

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I was very lucky as a child to have a mother who adored books, and she passed this love of reading on to me. I would read anything I could get my hands on (my mother ended up hiding her horror collection from me), from The BFG to Little Women, Goosebumps to The Famous Five, The Hardy Boys to The Hobbit, you name it, I read it.

If you’d told me that I couldn’t read certain children’s books I’d have been very disappointed – and probably have snuck a read anyway.

Like I say, I was lucky to have been brought up by my mother. Turns out I was also lucky to have been born when I was.

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“You like to buy us pink toys and everything else is for boys”

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I assume you’ve seen the Goldieblox advert by now? If not, have a look, see what you think.

First things first, I love the visuals of the advert. The idea of taking all these passive, pink, pretty things and turning them into some huge, fun, house sized chain reaction feat of engineering. That is excellent and I love it. Looks like fun, and I’d have been dying to try my own version as a young child. Very inspiring.

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